I won't talk crap about him, or say his name. I just felt for letting this out, and to write it seemed like an good idea.
I know he will never read this post, but I assume he knows how I feel. We still talk, which is good, but I have been too scared to really face him yet, but I'll get through that. Because I can't really stand losing him more than I already have.
The case is that I still love him very much, and probably will for a while, if not always as it feels like right now.
Aaanygay, I'm not mad at him, cause I would have done the same if i were him. I can understand and I just appreciate that he told me truth in the end, and I care about him a lot. He is one of the greatest, if not the greatest human being-s- I've met in my life, and I feel that I've learned so much from him.
It was first when I got to knew him I really managed to see and feel true happiness, and pain.
But how can you make a rainbow without a little rain, huh?
He taught me so much, and he means so much to me, even though everything we have gone through together.
To be honest; If I got one wish right now, I think I would have wished for him to be happy. The thought of wishing him back to me, would have been triggering, but no. If he wasn't happy, its not worth it if I would have been.
I guess he just wasn't as happy with me as I was with him, and then the point kinda .. disappears.
So if he only gets happy, and find that one person who really can make him. That would of course tear me apart, a bit, but I think that in the end I would have been happy. In my last moment, I think I would have managed to be happy for him, and just thought ''oh you lucky little bastard, you got her at last''
I kinda just wanted to make this post to get out some of my feelings after the break-up. Not to put any hate toward him or anything. Just to tell the truth and say that, I'm not mad, and I still care, and I want to manage to be happy for him, no matter what. And I hope I can manage to support him somehow.
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